When the tears seem as though they'll never end,
when life has boiled over and you have to pretend,
the thoughts are hazy and questions of why,
the heart so crumbled and wanting to die.
Through pain comes love and new perspective,
a stronger soul with a new objective,
the thoughts are clear with new composure,
finally free you now have closure.
Once you've made the decision to end the relationship and you both agree to go your separate ways, comes the booming reality of a different life, one filled with questions, pain, uncertainty and more pain.
You've cried for days or weeks or months, but have now decided it's time to move on and live your life. However, with the lingering pieces of a broken heart it's hard to figure out how, so here are some ideas to help you:
- Spend time with positive supportive friends and while in their company focus only on positive topics. Save sad stories for your therapist or journal or mom.
- Exercise. We get tired of hearing that exercise is a solution for many problems, but it really does help. You are focusing your energy on you in a positive way.
- Keep a journal of your feelings to help you process your experience and work through the pain.
- Help someone else in need. When we focus on doing something positive for someone else it let's us know that we are not alone in our pain and again we focus on something positive in life.
- Volunteer at a local animal shelter. Spend some time giving your love to an animal and receive love in return.
- Take a trip someplace you've dreamed of visiting.
- Dive back into a hobby you have or start a new hobby.
- Join a group or club of like minded people. Art, music, cycling, business, drama, politics anything that might be of interest to you.
- If you haven't done this already now is the time, pack up everything that has to do with him so you won't see constant reminders. Pictures, gifts you name it, pack it.
- Whatever you do, don't call, text or drive by his home or work.
- Eat healthy. Your body is your temple and deserves the very best.
- Be thankful for all the good things that you have in your life right now. If you have a hard time with this, take the time to write a list and post it on your fridge or bathroom mirror.
- Sleep. It's essential for your body to recoup from stress and is necessary to think clearly.
- Come up with a personal mantra and every time your mind starts to think about anything negative recite your mantra.
- Don't blame yourself or him. Blaming is a negative thought process that keeps you focused on the past. Now is the time to focus on the present and look to the future.
- Plan for the future. We all need something to hope for, it drives us, so plan something fun for yourself for the future, next week, next month, next year.
- Change your surrounding. Try rearranging your furniture, pictures and decor to get a new feel. Buy some new items such as bedspreads, pillows, decor or dishes to provide a new feel
- Have fun. Do whatever it is that brings you joy.
- Make a list of all of your great qualities, every thing you like about yourself and that your friends and co-workers like about you.
- Remember that you are an amazing, loving, caring person who is deserving of love, respect and faithfulness. Take the time to heal and let go of any baggage because out there in the world is an amazing person waiting to find you.
